OVERWHELMED

• Today's suggested practice: Day 14 of this month's practice... (see below)
• Note that even if you’re not ready to commit to this path, message me by Dec 15 and I’ll hold the earlybird pricing ($300 savings) for Part I, Path of the Sacred Masculine. Please share this with men who are ready for a change in 2023.
• My playlist while writing today's meditation: Jean Mouton, Neciens Mater Virgo Virum https://music.apple.com/ca/album/nesciens-mater-virgo-virum/1611974455?i=1611974755
• My morning practice: 6:30am: 30 minutes of yogic practice, including Meditation for Trust
• My vulnerability practice: Breathing deeply I allow this silence to deepen, to become sacred beyond my imagining, remembering that she brings me everything, and tenderly…

Hans Peter Meyer

VIDEO

Learning, again, to hold onto myself…

TODAY'S MEDITATION

I have to start today with gratitude for the men who’ve been working with me these past six months. When I look into their faces now, so much calmer. Everyone of them in their own way, seeing how they need to be to experience this life more richly. They are a reminder of what practice does. Daily, dedicated, devotional practice to our own stability and beauty.

One of the biggest steps forward for me —and perhaps you know that I’m not always a fan of “forward” or “progress” as it’s measured in this culture— forward out of misery and complaint and the feeling that “the gods are out to get me” (I’m quoting a student, who could have been quoting me from years ago…) —what moved me forward was the guidance by a mentor to practice gratitude.

That was years ago. A lesson learned in the drama of a first marriage ending, at a time when all seemed to be coming apart. And I was losing it…

A vivid memory: Standing in front of of a trusted friend, crying, telling him through my tears that everything was falling apart. All parts of my life —my marriage, my family, my work, my investments, my sense of self, all of it— falling apart. He stood there, holding me with his friendship and his wisdom a little deeper than mine, and from that deeper place told me that, from where he stood, it looked like things were falling together for me.

In the middle of things —in the muddle of life— it’s hard for me to know anything but the drama of that moment. And now I know that this is OK. To feel the storm and to feel it as waves of fear and despair and neediness and everything else that comes with those feelings. To feel all of this and to remember: it’s only a storm; it will pass; there will be more, for sure, but in the meantime there will also be calm. And beauty. And love. She, this divine and overwhelming feminine, gives me so much.

I am learning to enjoy these storms. At least, more so than I used to. I still am afraid. But I am also more confident. More able to sail Her storms, and Her calm. All of it.

I have been tested many times. Always. I still feel the visceral need to fight, to run, to freeze. It’s how I’ve been trained. But I’m changing that. Now I remember, in a deeper part of myself, what my friend showed me: I am always falling apart; my life is always falling apart; and always falling together.

So long as I am alive I will feel Her tearing at me with all of Her powers, all of Her gifts. So long as I am alive there will be currents and winds, the always-changing tides and seas that overwhelm me. And, overwhelmed, I also know the joy and pleasure of Her beauty, Her love.

TODAY’S INSPIRATIONS

🌀You deserve nothing. (Kendra Cunov)

🌀You must face annihilation over and over again to find out what is indestructible in yourself.

Pema Chodron

🌀 …they cannot experience the experience of receiving attention so they crave it.

…realize your role is to assist others in dealing and living with such a world. (Guru Singh & Guruperkarma Kaur)

🌀The Feminine only wants to nourish you. How are you resisting Her? (paraphrasing John Wineland)

🌀Vibrate the Cosmos. The Cosmos shall clear the path. (Aquarian Sutra 5)

🌀I am always impressed by you. (My beloved, my Oracle & Siren)

TODAY'S SUGGESTED PRACTICE

Day 14 of this month's practice, take 6 minutes today to sit and listen to “The Longing”…

Please read through first, then ...

• Today, sit (or stand) in stillness as you listen to your heart, your belly, your sex, your root and let this question stir within you…. How am I falling apart? How am I falling together? How can I hold myself, gently, as the falling apart becomes the falling together, and instead of fearing all the fears I enjoy all the feelings?

• Begin by closing your eyes and aligning your body into its truest, most elegant posture, tucking your chin to lift your heart, tilting your pelvis to straighten your spine. Become still, more still than you've ever been. Your alignment is the physical training for trustworthiness. Bring your hands to your heart, right (masculine) over left (feminine).

• Focus on feeling the vibration. That is all.

• Set your timer for 6 minutes or listen to “The Longing” by M Path here:

• As the timer signals or the song ends allow your eyes to slowly open. Take three, relaxed breath cycles, no pressing, no effort, and feel yourself full, without thoughts, open. Safe to receive. Then, step into your day, letting the mantra echo as a nourishing vibration whenever you become still. You don't need to DO anything. Let the world come to you with its demands, its complaints, and yes, its endless tide of gifts and blessings.✨